confidentiality

What rights do young people have?

Young people have a right:

• To be healthy
• To be safe
• To get information and ideas of all kinds
• To confidentiality and respect for their private life
• To use services (like their GP or special clinics about sexual health) to help them stay healthy
• To have their say if a professional person is making a decision that affects them.

When we think about young people's rights we also need to think about what the law says about sex and relationships and also what it says about young people using health services. The law in Scotland says:

A young person can use a health service or get medical treatment at any age (including without their parent's permission) as long as the young person understands what it is they are doing. This includes going to a sexual health clinic or asking for and getting contraception.

Young people can buy condoms at any age. They can also get free condoms from the C4U condom card scheme which runs across Dumfries and Galloway.
The age of consent in Scotland for boys and girls is 16. This means that if both people having sex are 16 or older, and both want to have sex, then it is legal to have sex. The age of consent is the same for people who are heterosexual, gay or lesbian.

There are special laws for some people with profound disabilities who may not be able to consent to sex.

If someone forces another person to have sex this is wrong and it is against the law and we encourage people to ask for help if they are being coerced in any way.

What about my rights and responsibilities as a parent?
In both The United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child, and important legislation in Scotland called The Children (Scotland) Act 1995, parents hold the main responsibility for the welfare of their child.

When it comes to their child's health parents can expect that a professional person would normally seek permission before providing any treatment or counselling for someone under the age of 16. So for example, schools normally ask parents for consent for young people to have immunisations.

But sometimes, when it comes to 13, 14 and 15 year olds, and sexual health matters young people don't want to involve their parents. This means that the professional person is in a difficult position. As we said earlier the law says that a young person can use a health service or get medical treatment at any age without their parent's permission as long as the young person understands what it is they are doing.

Professional people understand that parents can be very unhappy with this situation and so they follow rules which respect the young person's right to confidentiality, but they also do what they can to talk to the 13, 14 or 15 year old to encourage or help them to speak to their parent about these things. Professional people involved with young people about sexual health issues also want to reassure parents that by coming to a helping agency for information, help or advice the young person is doing a responsible thing.

How does confidentiality work?

Confidentiality is one of the most important areas of rights that young people usually want to check out when they are speaking to a professional person about sexual health. We explain to them confidentiality means that if they talk to a professional person about something to do with their sexual health, that person should not tell other people without the young person's permission. Whatever age the young person is they have the right to confidentiality.

What about under 16's?

Of course parents are understandably concerned about their son or daughter becoming sexually active if they are under 16. This is the kind of information we give to young people who are 13, 14 or 15 years old:

If a young person is 13, 14 or 15 years old and they ask for contraception, or they are concerned about something to do with their sexual health, then the professional person they talk to will encourage them to talk to their parent. But a professional person cannot make them do this, and the professional person must not pass on information about the young person to a parent without permission.

Even though 13, 14 and 15 year olds have a right to ask for advice or information or contraception a doctor can say no if they don't normally work with under 16's, but they must keep the request confidential and they will usually tell the young person where else they can go.

The law wants to protect young people under 16 from harm. This means that we have an age of consent which says that if young people are having sex when they are under 16 there are laws which are there to protect them that they need to know about.

We explain to young people that most people wait until they are 16 or older before having sex. But sometimes people have sex before their 16th birthday. In this case we explain to young people what the law says about this.

What does the law say about 13, 14 or 15 years olds having sex?

If the young person and their partner are heterosexual and are both 13, 14 or 15 years old and they have sex the boy is breaking the law.

If the young person and their partner are gay and are both 13, 14 or 15 years old and they have sex they are both breaking the law.

If the young person and their partner are both lesbian and are both 13, 14 or 15 years old and they have sex neither of them is breaking the law.

If one of the young people is 13, 14 or 15 years old and their partner is 16 or older the older person is breaking the law.

But surely it's not just about young people's rights and the law?

Of course, its not, these are just statements of fact. We want young people to understand that they deserve the best when it comes to their personal and sexual relationships. This means that we say to them that while laws may be broken by young people having sex (as described above) we don't want them to be overly worried about this, this is because we want them to feel that they can talk to someone to get the information, advice or support they need to make sure they make good, safe decisions. We don't want them to be frightened, this will only make them more vulnerable.

We want them to understand that although a professional person will encourage and help them to speak to their parents, at the end of the day they will give them the information, advice or support they need to keep safe.

We also remind young people that it is always wrong and against the law to force someone to have sex no matter what age those involved are.

But what about child protection when it comes to 13, 14 and 15 year olds having sex?

We try to get over to young people this age that if parents or professional people think they are having sex then they may be worried about them. We say to young people that while we understand it isn't always easy to talk to their parents they should consider doing so, but that if they really think they can't, they should definitely then talk with one of our helping agencies, who in turn might be able to help them prepare how to talk to their parents.

One of the key things we try to get over to young people this age is that if a professional person is worried about them having sex that they would call this child protection. We explain that the kind of thing that would worry a professional person would be if the person having sex with the 13, 14 or 15 year old is:

• much older than them
• or they are asking the young person to keep their relationship secret and telling them not to talk to anyone to get the information, advice or support they need
• or they are trying to keep the young person involved with them by buying them things or giving them money
• or they are asking the young person to do things that are making them feel uncomfortable
• or they are hurting the young person in some way.

We hope that young people understand that professional people think about child protection because they want to make sure young people are safe. We explain that if the professional is worried about a young person they will usually talk to them about this and if they feel that they need to do more to protect the young person from harm they will talk to other professional people who are experts in child protection, they might be doctors, social workers or police officers. These people will then decide what its best to do to help keep the young person safe and healthy.

Where can I get help or support as a parent?

ParentLine Scotland describes its service as follows:
At some time all parents find that parenting can be difficult, stressful, and even impossible. ParentLine Scotland is the free, confidential, telephone helpline for parents and anyone caring for a child in Scotland. You can call about any problem, however big or small.

At ParentLine Scotland we don't tell parents what to do or how to bring up their children. We listen, help callers express their feelings and support them to find a way forward. Telephone helplines allow anonymity and give callers an opportunity to 'offload' and to be pointed in the right direction for information and support. Many callers phone when they are at the end of their tether, but you don't have to leave it till a situation nears crisis point. Often just talking things through can be a big help!

ParentLine is open for telephone calls from parents on Monday, Wednesday & Friday between 9am - 5pm or Tuesday & Thursday between 9am - 9pm.
Phone 0808 800 2222.
More at their website at http://www.children1st.org.uk/parentline/

Parents Enquiry Scotland has been in existence for about 30 years, offering support to parents and their gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender children across Scotland. One of the main problems faced by families of LGBT children is a sense of isolation, so the parents involved are happy to meet people, usually one-to-one but sometimes in groups.

The group also provides speakers to talk to interested organisations and have a comprehensive book list and leaflets available. Confidential help-lines are operated by parents. They are not counsellors but have been through the experience of learning to understand and support their own gay children. Telephone calls are welcome at any reasonable time, but as help-lines are operated from parents own homes you can leave a message or try again if you don't get through the first time.

Further information is available on the admin line at 0131 556 6047 or at the website at http://www.parentsenquiryscotland.org/
or email parentsenquiry@hotmail.com

This page has been taken directly from the Healthy Respect website and has been edited to include information relevant to Dumfries and Galloway.